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Family: Dealing With Conflict
By Nick Arrizza, M.D.
What is the real nature of conflict?

Most think it has to do with one or more individuals trying to get their competing needs met at the same time.

If this is the mindset that individuals start with then attempts to resolve such conflicts in the face of such limitations are bound to fail.

It is my view that it is the "very needs" themselves that are the problem. Let me explain.

When you have a need that "needs to be met" how are you left feeling? Well if you look at the experience closely you will likely notice some or all of the following:

1. Feelings of lack.

2. Feelings of urgency.

3. Feelings of impatience.

4. Feelings of self absorption.

5. Feelings of frustration.

6. Feeling distracted by the need.

7. Feeling uncomfortable either emotionally and/or physically.

8. Feeling tense in your body and "rigid" in your behavior.

9. Feeling “needy”, etc.

Now place two individuals in a room together who are feeling this same way and I think you can guess what

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will happen.

You see the problem starts even before the two individuals confront each other. They are already "primed" to be set off by the other by the “needy state” they find themselves in.

So what can be done to address this?

Well the answer is to "diffuse" the emotional, mental and behavioral effects of the "needy state" first.

I will give an example of how this can be accomplished here.

Let's look at the usefulness of being in the "needy state".

Some might suggest that it:

1. Helps you get your need met, so that,

2. You will feel fulfilled, satisfied, calm, happy, joyful and at peace.

In other words: (A) The "needy state" makes you feel fulfilled, satisfied, calm, happy, joyful and at peace.

Now does that sound like the experience of "being" in that needy state? Absolutely not!

So is statement (A) true or not? Well I think that you can see that it is false, correct?

If so then simply admit that to yourself now.

Now does the "needy state" itself feel "toxic" to you?

If so then admit that to yourself now.

Now do you want?

a) Statement (A) living inside you?
b) The needy state living inside you?

If not, then from deep within yourself make a request that they both be purged from your body and your life forever.

Now notice how you feel.

I think if you've followed me so far that you feel more able to congenially and calmly address your situation with others now.


Dr. Nick Arrizza is trained in Chemical Engineering, Business Management & Leadership, Medicine and Psychiatry. He is an Energy Psychiatrist, Healer, Key Note Speaker,Editor of a New Ezine Called "Spirituality And Science" (which is requesting high quality article submissions) Author of "Esteem for the Self: A Manual for Personal Transformation" (available in ebook format on his web site), Stress Management Coach, Peak Performance Coach & Energy Medicine Researcher, Specializes in Life and Executive Performance Coaching, is the Developer of a powerful new tool called the Mind Resonance Process(TM) that helps build physical, emotional, mental and spiritual well being by helping to permanently release negative beliefs, emotions, perceptions and memories. He holds live workshops, international telephone coaching sessions and international teleconference workshops on Physical. Emotional, Mental and Spiritual Well Being.

Business URL #1: http://www.telecoaching4u.com

Personal URL: http://www.telecoaching4u.com/Spirituality_And_Science.htm

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Nick_Arrizza,_M.D.

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What Is Workplace Conflict Costing Your Company?
By Kenneth R. Blankenship
Over the years I have come across several tools that put a dollars and sense value on the matter of workplace conflict and the importance of its resolution. There are several assumptions in Read more...
Sell Your Used Car Immediately For Same Day Cash
By Jaime Mintun
When you decided to sell your used car, you likely chose to sell it so you could buy another car, because you needed to liquidate it for cash, or because you're moving. Either way, it's in your best Read more...
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There are many conflicting theories as to what the experts consider to be healthy. There are multiple different approaches to living a healthy lifestyle. However, all healthy people do have one thing Read more...
Conflict In Jammu And Kashmir - Part Ii
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Operations Other Than War Operations Other than War (OOW), relate to activities devolving around the strategy of ‘Winning the Hearts and Minds’. It focuses on people as the Centre of Read more...
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opposition in a work of drama or fiction between characters or forces (especially an opposition that motivates the development of the plot); "this form of conflict is essential to Mann's writing"